Redemption in a Big Box
The size of the building and hours of operation are
the advertisement.
It’s big. Huge. The hugest.
And it’s available every hour of the
day and
night.
Make no mistake—
the store
is a temple.
Sometimes I go there
to get my life in order
4am pilgrimages with a changepurse full of doves.
More ubiquitous than Catholic tabernacles
More sterile than an ER
It calls for me and I follow.
Tonight
they’re waxing
always waxing
always cleaning
Always cleansing
The floor is glowing,
bleeding soft white
all round
the faces
of employees gliding
by.
Stockboys recognize me
lock eyes and slink
back to the depths
of their shelves
“Who is crazier than someone who works at 4am,”
they wonder.
The guy who prays at 4am,
they discover.
I close somberly
with a quick one
in the produce aisle
tossing green beans in my hand
releasing back to the shelf
none of the greens green
enough.
I expected this much
at 4:30 in the morning
but pretend to be disappointed.
Stocky hispanic man
At the checkout counter
The only other parishioner.
Shaved head.
A monk?
(One last chance?)
Flirting
with the girl on
the other side
of the pew.
As I
approach
“I’ve got five on it! Remember that song, girl?! Remember that song from 1994?
(sic)
L-
U-
N-
E-
S!
(sic)”
Maybe the headphones slung
over his shoulder reminded him
Maybe the dollar amount of change
I didn’t know
Got there
too late.
“It’s got me stuck and not
go back
I got
five on it!”
He’s bouncing now
keyed up.
When you find it you don’t want
to release
and neither did he
“What do you know about that song, girl??
What do you know about 1994??
“1994
I was in Ft Worth
Texas in
1994
teaching IRAQIS how
to shoot missiles
out
of the sky!
“—in 1994!!
“That’s what was up!
in 1994
“Do YOU remember 1994?”
I wince hard and the light folds into itself
blurring the edges
of everything
everyone.
The box looks like Heaven.
What do I know about 1994?
What do I know about today?
They didn’t have the mattress pad
I was looking for.
I’ll come back
in a few days.
